Good morning baby I hope I'm gonna make it through another day

Saturday, September 29, 2007

had an oreo milkshake since i found a whole lot of oreos in the drawer.haha.OREO HIGH:)

friday started out bad.met up with liz later on before tuition for beef noodles! and a good chat.i got my red SC tee:)actually,i rather get SC tees than V tees.haha.OOPS.we went in on time that day but it doesnt pay to go in early cause you just get called on more.ended the shitty week on a good note:)

it's still exam period and shuen's advic-ing me to keep off FB.hahah.that's good advice cause it's addictive but i've been having more self discipline,it's not like i'm there often these few days.haha.
I'M SUPPOSED TO BE STUDYING!

random photos.

I see the sight, with a different light,
Words cannot describe the way I'm feeling,
Cause I've been searching in my head,
For the words I thought she'd said,
For too long.
I feel her. Slipping through my fingers,
Now she's gone, I'm sleeping with the light on,
And sharks swim through my veins now, that she's gone,
I'm sleeping with the light on.
The way you always made me look at you
With all the simple things you said
The way so many things surrounded you
And all the tears it seemed to make
And now I'm falling
There's nothing left to say
And I can't break free
Out from in me there
And I can't breathe without you
The way I never thought I'd leave this place
The way you made it seem so real
Cause you have faith and you had empathy
And all I needed was this
And now we're falling
Got nothing left to say?
And I can't break free
Out from in me there
It's written all over your face
Such a painful thing to waste
Tell me now where do we go?
Now the future's not so clear
I can't believe we've ended here
Where's the world that doesn't care?
Maybe I could meet you there
So tell me why, i'm swimming against the tide
And i'm praying for a lifeline, cos i'm
Losing you
So tell me why, you don't care enough to try
Are you giving up this fight
You take my words
But then you hear them a different way
The way you're talking leaves
Me not quite sure what to say
We're talking now
But is it too late?
Everythings the same
It's like tomorrow never came
We used to talk about - whatever
And the seasons never change
We never used to act our age, everytime we were - together
The whole world was watching and laughing
On the day that i crashed and burned
At your feet
Look at me up in the sky
I watch the world just pass me by
And all my feelings give me away
It's happening more everyday
Loving you could be so easy
Loving you could be so great
But how can I try to explain
Your story never seems to stay the same
You're out of touch and I'm out of time
Just talk to me a while
And joke about the things we used to see
It's so hard for me to smile

hello BUSTEDBUSTEDBUSTED!haha.the other day,chee and i were just talking bout them and charlie's sexy voice on the bus.haha.they're like all-time favourites man!she can have her james,i'll just settle for charlie and his nice voice!haha.
i cant wait for stoning sessions at starbucks after exams!

perfect prom queen ;

Thursday, September 27, 2007

two subjects down,five more to go.

i saw a whole lot of cereals today and felt like buying all of them-milo balls,mueslix,honey stars and peanut butter crunch!i feel like going grocery shopping!haha.
i feel like eating butter crisps,tim tams,food republic's hokkien mee,island creamery or pluck's ice cream,din tai fung's xiaolongbao,holland V's hor fun,bedok's charkwayteow,simpang's prata,$1 pandan waffles,kaya fondue,a good steak,Max B's suckao,Dim Sum,pasta,satay,provence's sandwiches,good jap food,pop doh,beef noodles,taka's omu rice and manymany more foooood.gahh.

med students are like the luckiest people in singapore now.everyone's like having exams or mugging for exams next week and those lucky people dont have a single one.argh,how i would like to be in their shoes now but i dont wanna do med nor can i do med.haha.

was walking to the station today in the rain.ages since a walk in the rain since no walks to telok kurau,which also means no aidan:( the sky was uber dark and all and suddenly i remembered someone mentioning before something bout crying in the rain.you feel like you're not really crying cause the rain pelting down mixes with your streams of tears so you feel like you're not crying.i just remembered and found it amusing.what's wrong with having a good cry once in a while when you need it?everyone needs an outlet once in a while to make them feel better.

mind games are so draining emotionally and mentally,how they stump you for so long,even manymany days later trying to figure it out cause it matters and you feel like you're going round in circles trying to talk yourself through this,just going through the motions and waiting over here but like how BK said today,everything is in His time.

I'm 15 for a moment
Caught in between 10 and 20
And I'm just dreaming
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose
15, there's never a wish better than this
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy, Time to lose yourself
Within a morning star
15 I'm all right with you
15, there's never a wish better than this

yea.15.the time of your life.

perfect prom queen ;

Monday, September 24, 2007

i'm like sneezing my head off in front of the comp now for no reason.weird.

supposed to meet kenrick chin-a-chin to study at the airport after tuition.bumped into jayne who was also studying and CNN came and crash.jayne and i claimed tables of our own-all the space in the world to throw notes around!i wish!hahah.and the other two were super noisy and talkative for guys.they had like a corner to themselves and made so much noise.

more tuition and rushing home to try and study as much as possible tomorrow.gahhh.

hmm.just thinking bout this year,it has been one helluva rollercoaster of a year,accompanied with it,a rollercoaster of emotions too.
'07 hasnt been that great a year,was expecting it to be,okay,not better but at least comparable to '06 but it hasnt.the year has been more down than up.
the year started out bad,with so many people leaving and all the things happening.
all the struggles
more people leaving middle of the year
and now there's the dreaded exams.
well i guess it hasn't been all that bad,found back the joy and closed the distance in my walk,having the renewed faith and joy to run His race.
well,there's still a few more months left in '07,we'll see.and i guess the starting of the year was worst than now,or is it just as bad?
why is it always the same person that affects you so much whether in or out of your life.

hey my dear girl,shit happens but dont give up now when you're nearing the end of it all.in a month's time or so,it'll all be over so perservere though the results may not be ideal now but they will be for the real thing!love you darl.

empty apartment-all-time favourite yet doesnt fail to put me in an emo state
Call me out
You stayed inside
One you love
Is where you hide
Shot me down as I flew by
Crash and burn
I think sometimes you forget where the heart is

Answer no to these questions
Let her go, learn a lesson
It's not me, you're not listening now
Can't you see something's missing?
You forget where the heart is

Take you away from that empty apartment
You stay and forget where the heart is
Someday if ever you love me you'd say it's okay

Waking up from this nightmare
How's your life, what's it like there?
Is it all what you want it to be?
Does it hurt when you think about me?
And how broken my heart is

Take you away from that empty apartment
You stay and forget where the heart is
Someday if ever you love me you'd say it's okay

It's okay to be angry and never let go
It only gets harder the more that you know
When you get lonely if no one's around
You know that I'll catch you when you're falling down
We came together but you left alone
And I know how it feels to walk out on your own
Maybe someday I will see you again
And you'll look me in my eyes and call me your friend

Take you away from that empty apartment
You stay and forget where the heart is
Someday if ever you love me you'd say its okay
It's okay

perfect prom queen ;

Sunday, September 23, 2007

stress+hormones makes an emotional girl.bad combination.
i've learnt,when the going gets tough,let it all out before picking yourself up and be stronger to get through this period.
thank you to those who cared and all,even unexpected ones.

Mad and Stan's wedding yesterday!it was really nice!their invitation is so cute.pastor chan was pretty funny during his speech and all.Towards the end of the wedding,mad sang this song for stanley.so sweet!
the girls went on a camwhoring high.haha.fun to see everyone all dressed up.dont have the full picture with mad,stan.marenites and livingstones in our hands,it's with the official photographer.
rushed down to the mooncake thingy after,couldnt go to HK cafe with deb and carol.we'll go soon!after my exams or your A's!deb,i'll start the album soon,i promise!

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

help me through this last lap.you've been the only constant throughout everything,give me the strength to pull through.i place my trust that you'll guide me along cause we can do all things through you:)

Lie in this empty bed
With this aching head
You left me here this morning
Now I can't remember why
I let you in again
To get under my skin
And every time you disappear
And I remember how

I am afraid right now
I don't wanna let you down
And I am the one who can't be saved
The only thing I say
I am afraid right now
What if I can't get out?
What if I don't want to be saved?
This is me afraid

perfect prom queen ;

Saturday, September 15, 2007

gosh.i'm down sick.now is such a bad time to fall sick and yet it has to be now.sigh.

i'm so annoyed with myself.gahhh.

Pictures and photographs
Memories and windows
Goodbyes and epitaphs
Heartbeats and hellos

perfect prom queen ;

Thursday, September 13, 2007

i really need to seriously mug hard and have some SELF DISCIPLINE and MOTIVATION to study.like really be able to concentrate for HOURS ON END.that would be IDEAL.but it's too idealistic knowing how easy i get distracted.gahh.someone help me.

i think i screwed the electives test today.nvm.it's over.

maybe the exterior is just a shell to hold in everything going on inside
the expressions are just a happy/okay mask to conceal all emotions

ahhh.i found someone with FM Static's tonight!LIKE FINALLY!seems like almost everyone doesnt have it.poline send it to me soon!haha.

gosh.i've been eating so much lately and there's been supper for many nights in a row.porridge last night and tonight.wonder what's it gonna be tomorrow.haha.all that food:)

But I'm the first to fall and the last to know
Now I'm heels over head,
I'm hanging upside down

perfect prom queen ;

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

i'm proud of myself.i havent been to FB in like four days.talk bout self discipline,coming from the person with zilch self discipline!haha.i need more self discipline and motivation!

ahh!i'm disliking school and everything related to it except the girls:)haha

you come and go as and when you feel like it
the cycle goes on and on
seems like everything is just because it's to your fancy or when you feel like it
as this goes on,
maybe one day you wont mean a thing anymore

jenny is stuck in my head after hearing it on the radio!
First you say you wont
then you say you will
you keep me hanging on
but we're not moving on
we're standing still
jenny:)

perfect prom queen ;

Monday, September 10, 2007

yesterday
speaker for service was really awesome and really inspiring,living testimony of His grace flowing in people's lives,despite their circumstances.
went for dinner at sakae with the fam.gosh.i want more sushi.

fri and sun

they're showing tyra banks in the evenings again!finally!after all those weeks of debates.
i need a dose of One Tree Hill

nathan and haley.my fave tree hill couple:)
or Grey's Anatomy

or THE OC!

Adam brody and Rachel bilson!my fave onscreen and offscreen couple but now just onscreen.still,they're cute together:)
i cant wait till she gets OTH3 and 4.

just had chocolate prata tissue for supper.gosh.i've been eating so much lately.it's
been prata tissue for supper a few nights in a row.

I wish my life was this song
cause songs they never die
I could write for years and years
and never have to cry
I’d show you how I feel
with out saying a word

perfect prom queen ;

Sunday, September 09, 2007

you see me through the seasons
my rock of faith
come what may

perfect prom queen ;

Saturday, September 08, 2007

gosh.i think the PSP and FB are such time-sucking devices.the PSP sucked my afternoon away.they're such distractions and so addictive!

thursday
woke up damn early for tuition then went to meet the rest for bernice's birthday lunch at fish&co.i was the earliest for once,though it was already past the meeting time.haha.decided to walk around and bumped into stephy and cam.it was so coincidental after seeing her the night before.
After lunch,hung out at starbucks.left them to rush off to meet myrna for BS.

yesterday
went to meet friday night lover after her_____left.went for tuition third time in seven days and lao shi was lamenting bout meeting us so many times too.haha.
i think E&R and E&H are so sweet.
closet westlife fan,hurry come back and bring her back!you guys can contend for spots on the list too.hahaha.

ahh there's so much stuff to do yet so little time.and i still need a dress for mad and stan's wedding.deb,we're so running out of time!

even though things may seem alright on the surface, things may not seem as what it may seem to be deep down inside.There are questions and I don't know the answers.i'm confused by your actions and i dont know what to expect.i mean,i'm dealing with the unpredictable you now right.
i think hearing that sentence last week just proved how stupid i was again.what am i to expect?what am i supposed to believe?you were the one who gave us up in the first place right.

just because she comes off strong doesnt mean she didnt fall asleep crying and even though she acts like nothing is wrong,maybe just maybe,she's really good at lying

I thought I had control
But I slipped, and I don’t, and I don’t know where to go
I thought I knew it all

I used to rely on self-medication,
I guess I still do that from time to time.
But I'm getting better at fighting the future,
Someday you'll be fine
Yes, I'll be just fine.

Give me a reason, I don't believe a word
To end this discussion, of anything I've heard
To break with tradition, they tell me that it's not so hard
To fall and divide, it's not so hard
So let's not get carried away with everything
Away with the process from here to in between
Of healing relations, the long goodbye.

perfect prom queen ;

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

okay.havent updated in a while.lots of stuff going on.
talked to like two people last week which was kinda unexpected cause i mean they're like always there and dont say much but weirdly they observe and understand.hmm i guess it put things into more perspectives,seeing things differently.
hmmm.em left last sat and on sunday,it was a day at the bird park since the bro was performing,i had to go.rushed off to meet liz after that for makeup tuition.i think i'm seeing friday night lover like THREE times in SEVEN days,okay.nothing compared to seeing each other everyday last time.haha.

had to go back to school these few days for lectures which deprived me of my much-needed sleep.i was late today cause i kept pressing the snooze button.haha.hmmm.Bernice's birthday was yesterday
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BERNICE!
supposed to go out for her lunch after school then it was postponed.After school,went to meet D for a while to talk and got chocolates too,they made me feel better.chocolate is like the cure for everything!i guess straighten out my thinking bout stuff.thanks for the chocs:)came home,studied abit and went to the gym.haha.i kept to the weekly gym session!

rushed home today after piano to shower and change before heading down to carissa park to meet stephy then we went down to bark for dinner.great dinner.beef stew and beer battered fish.then we went down to haagen das for dessert.haha.awesome time with the bestie catching up and camwhoring too.haha.
okay i guess i shall let the pictures do the talking.
pictures

the boy

airport,liz and my TAUHU GORENG:)

welcome to our retarded world

GREY'S!my fave grey's quote.haha.i want the dvds!it's like no kick watching only one episode each week!

One of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here
Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
lifehouse:)

perfect prom queen ;

Sunday, September 02, 2007

why does action and the will and determination to make it happen never collide?making me spiral back to everything.it feels like taking one step forward and two steps back.
they're like two different routes,like a fork in the road.one to the left,one to the right,never colliding anywhere down the road.

sent em off at the airport yesterday.hmm.the airport's becoming a sadder and sadder place.seems like lots of people leaving my life this year and amongst them,important ones.

you blow hot and cold,making me confused and i dont know what i'm doing.i'm at a loss.

okay.a better update and pictures up soon.i'm in no mood today.

my life is sliding
I tried to ride the wave
It came down crashing, it's time to start again
Backwards to go forward
Left at every corner
Been there and back again
And when the music ends
Your life is a flashback
A question, a photograph
A statement, a story, a struggle
A chance to laugh
Cause if you don't laugh you cry
A last crescendo when you die
So hit the rewind and listen
It's the playback
The soundtrack to your life

perfect prom queen ;